Maybe I need a letter...

Chief preached a sermon yesterday on Timothy. Unfortunately, this post isn't about his wonderful sermon (sorry, honey). And it was wonderful!

It just got me to thinking about the letter itself. No one writes like that anymore. Actually, I'm not sure if anyone BUT Paul wrote like that. A letter of utter encouragement and discipline. Altogether in one shot. Like the letters to the Hebrews (really, it's not for certain that Paul is the author of this letter, but for this blog, let's just assume he is), the Ephesians, the Philippians, Titus, the Galatians...you get the idea...who writes like that? Still...think about it. Wouldn't you like to write something that profound? Have anyone in mind?

Isn't there someone in your circle of family or friends who could use a good "letter"? Do you have the hutzpah? Why are we so afraid to speak the truth to those we honestly love? When in the world did we get so tolerant of the sin around us? I guess "in the world" would be the key phrase here. Jesus...Peter...Paul...James...John...they were not so tolerant. Truth abounds in their words and in their writings. We hear it preached to us from the pulpit...and we nod our heads in agreement. We may even say an "amen" or two. We MAY even shout out a "PREACH IT" once in a while when it hits us directly. BUT...are we willing to BE the one writing the letter we listen to on Sunday morning?

Are we willing to stand on God's principles to reach out to that family member who is really happy, but is, in the long run, hurting themselves? Are we willing to speak truth into that person's life? "LORD, who may dwell in your sanctuary? Who may live on your holy hill? He whose walk is blameless and who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from his heart" Psalm 15:1-2 Certainly WE are not blameless. On the contrary, we are about as imperfect as any creature could be, but, as a Believer, it is our responsiblity to not tolerate sin. To be loving in our rebuke...and we DO need to rebuke when it's necessary.

Tolerance. Where is THAT in God's Word? Yep...I found it. Romans 2:3-5 says this: "So when you, a mere man, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God's judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance? But because of your stubbornness and your unrepentant heart, you are storing up wrath against yourself for the day of God's wrath, when his righteous judgment will be revealed."

This passage is not talking about OUR tolerance, but GOD'S tolerance. Does God tolerate sin? Absolutely not. Should we? No. We should not. We should live our lives realizing God's kindness towards us...which leads us to repentance...which leads us to His grace and mercy...which leads us to His ultimate gift of salvation.

Should we, maybe, be writing a letter to OURSELVES? Probably. But I think we do an injustice to those we profess we love when we tolerate the sin in which they live. Oh please...don't get all high and mighty on me and believe for one minute that you will not be judged for your indifference to a loved ones blatant blasphemy you disguise as tolerance of their life style. "Everyone has a RIGHT to believe any way they choose." You are also saying "Everyone has the RIGHT to live for eternity in Hell...I am going to heaven, why should I care?"

This was actually a difficult blog for me. Undoubtedly because I am the worst offender of apathetic tolerance. It's been on my mind for the past week or so. Because of the book I am reading on Humility by Andrew Murray. How can I put on the humility of Christ when I am blatantly aware of my sin? I can't. I can only trust that each and every day when I come before my Father and I repent, I mean it and He forgives me. Completely. We need to share that with those who live in tolerance. God does not, cannot, will not TOLERATE sin. Any sin. As humans, we put a "degree" on sins committed...but God is clear when He says "the wages of SIN is death." BDILE actually shared a message about this very thing in our Bible study Saturday morning...I should thank her for her words of discipline and encouragement...THANK YOU!

So...for all of you that actually READ my blogs...(thank you, by-the-way) I am the one who needs a letter...any takers?

The Ride of a Lifetime...

I am so blessed to have good friends and family who "understand" me! At least they want to understand me...and that means so much to me.

It's been a rollercoaster ride, this life of mine, and there have been many riders along the way. Some keep coming back for more thrills...spills...excitement! And, still, some only ride once. Maybe twice.

Personally...I don't like rollercoasters. They make me sick. Ironic, isn't it? When you think of your life, in general, do you think of a carnival ride? Or a quiet beach...a serene snow-covered mountain...a parade...a fire-works display...insert-adjectives-here? There have been times when my life was serene, but...seriously, I cannot think of any time my life was serene, that doesn't mean those times did not exist for me. They are just not prevelant in my mind right now.

Today, my life is...well, for lack of a bigger-better word...good. Can you relate? UGH...I digress...this is about rollercoasters. Really.

When you first get on a rollercoaster, you are strapped in tightly (you know, so you won't FALL OUT AND DIE WHEN YOU SPEED THROUGH THE LOOP-DE-LOOP UPSIDE-DOWN!) and once the car is full, you SLOWLY begin your ascent up that REALLY steep grade. Close to the top of this climb, you are looking forward and there is nothing there. Just sky. Your stomach is already flipping over in anticipation. Then the slightest hesitation at the very top and DOWN-DOWN-DOWN you go curving around sideways, upside-down, sideways again, upside-down again...then ANOTHER slow climb up. DOWN-DOWN-DOWN...sideways...upside-down...sideways...up...down...up...down...all the while EVERYONE around you is screaming! Frantically. Then...after what seems to be an eternity of screaming and tears and fear and thrills and would-someone-please-stop-this-thing-so-I-can-get-off fright, it's over. In a moment. Literally. All of that happens in about 5 minutes.

Oh, come on...you knew life was like that! Didn't you? You're born...you blink...you die. A little morbid, yes, but, true nonetheless.

So...even though rollercoasters in REAL life make me sick...I am happy to be on one right now. And I couldn't be more pleased with my passengers! It's really been a great ride and I wouldn't have wanted it to be any different. Sometimes the coaster needs some repair, and I am grateful for mechanics who know what they are doing so my ride is safe for all who climb that steep grade with me.

Thanks for stopping by...maybe NEXT time my life will seem like that serene mountain top. Who knows? BUT...the only way to find out is to keep stopping by...admission is free and the view is fabulous!

Take a ride with me...

"Winter, slumbering in the open air, wears on its smiling face a dream... of spring. Ciao."

Wow...what has happened to everyone? Has the winter doldrums taken it's toll??? No one is blogging anymore! I remember when I would rush into this computer room at the very glimpse of a sunrise to check everyone's latest post.

Now...I drag myself out of bed...then go BACK to bed (because I CAN!) and sometime around noon-something, I take a look at the computer and sigh "nah...not today."

I certainly cannot say that I have blogged for blogging sake, but, I do wish I would get the "blogger-bug" once again. My mind is a cooler full of slush. No, really!

My AZ friends will certainly have something to say about this...I still love my WI home, but I am seriously bored with the below-zero-white-stuff. Easter is a scant 4 weeks away and I do believe it could be a white one at that. (Hmmm...just like LAST year and it was in APRIL.)

ANYWAY...how about some reading material?? Anyone out there care to rev up the old blog?? I'll be waiting...and checking...

(And btw...my title is a quote from what movie??) :~)

Pride Goeth Before the Fall...

...and I am falling. Not too happy about that. So, here's the thing: I am involved in this great study on Humility. As a Believer...and I AM a Believer...it is the purpose of my life to be more like Christ everyday. To be more like Christ. 100% God...100% Man who walked this earth in perfect, unblemished humility. Whose life was the epitome, the absolute embodiment of humility. Me...100% man. To be like Him. A goal too lofty, too difficult to attain. I know it...you know it...still; I strive for it. Knowing I will fail. Because I am 100% MAN!

I haven't really thought about being unable to attain a life like His, until I was faced with my own incredible guilt and pride...two things tucked away in the deepest, darkest chambers of my obviously worn out, dusty old heart. And I just want to THANK my sisters for helping make it this real by having the audacity to invite me to pray for my "old" home. Please, I say this tongue-in-cheek, do not get the idea I think praying is ludacris. Ridiculous maybe...ludacris, no. Oops...sorry, there I go again.

I had believed that my hurt poor-poor-pitiful-me feelings for this place had long vanished. Obviously those wounds were just hiding in those chambers I talked about before. Just waiting to be ripped open, raw and vulnerable. I don't WANT to pray for someone who hurt me. Who left me...forgotten and floundering in an unknown land of new ministry without a shred of respect. "Not even a kiss my foot or have an apple!" Hurt by my old home. Disrespected. Barren. Afraid. Vulnerable.

And if that wasn't bad enough...my NEW home thought I was evil. All of me. They didn't teach us this Pastor's wives school...oh wait, I didn't GO to school. Silly me.

Okay, here it is: PRIDE: 1. a high or inordinate opinion of one's own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc. 2. the state or feeling of being proud.
3. a becoming or dignified sense of what is due to oneself or one's position or character; self-respect; self-esteem.

BAD PRIDE. BAD BAD Pride! This IS the pride we are discussing in the study. Not the GOOD pride: PRIDE and joy: someone or something cherished, valued, or enjoyed above all others. That's what WE are to God. Our Heavenly Father. His pride and joy. The apple of His eye. Right? SOMEONE say yes.

There are a few definitions to the word pride. Look it up. :~) There is only one definition of the word HUMILITY: the quality or condition of being humble; modest opinion or estimate of one's own importance, rank, etc.

So...the idea of regarding myself as less than those around me (known or unknown) is not a foreign concept to me. I KNOW I am less. So, when I SAY I have "forgiven" a hurt against me, WHY do I allow pride to rear it's ugly, evil head? I really believed it had dissipated. Vanished. Disappeared.

Here I am, like Mephibosheth when he faced David "...Shuffling and stammering, not looking him in the eye, Mephibosheth said, "Who am I that you pay attention to a stray dog like me?" 2 Samuel 9:8 I AM a stray dog. Low, like a snake on the ground. Never seeing the pride until it's almost too late to do anything about it.

I am hurting. I do not want to have these feelings of despair. Like I CANNOT pray because my heart is overflowing with evil. I cannot find forgiveness. Not for them, not for me. So, here I lay...prostrate before my Father crying out in my despondancy...a new song for us:

"I need You Jesus, to come to my rescue, where else can I go, there’s no other Name by which I am saved, capture me with grace.

I have no place to go. No comfort for this 100% man. My pride is overwhelming me. Humility is a distant relief. I cannot reach it. Touch it. Holy Spirit, envelope me. Find me. Rescue me.

"Energize the limp hands,
strengthen the rubbery knees.
Tell fearful souls,
"Courage! Take heart!
God is here, right here,
on his way to put things right
And redress all wrongs.
He's on his way! He'll save you!" Isaiah 35:3-4 (The Message)

So...here I wait...