"Winter, slumbering in the open air, wears on its smiling face a dream... of spring. Ciao."

Wow...what has happened to everyone? Has the winter doldrums taken it's toll??? No one is blogging anymore! I remember when I would rush into this computer room at the very glimpse of a sunrise to check everyone's latest post.

Now...I drag myself out of bed...then go BACK to bed (because I CAN!) and sometime around noon-something, I take a look at the computer and sigh "nah...not today."

I certainly cannot say that I have blogged for blogging sake, but, I do wish I would get the "blogger-bug" once again. My mind is a cooler full of slush. No, really!

My AZ friends will certainly have something to say about this...I still love my WI home, but I am seriously bored with the below-zero-white-stuff. Easter is a scant 4 weeks away and I do believe it could be a white one at that. (Hmmm...just like LAST year and it was in APRIL.)

ANYWAY...how about some reading material?? Anyone out there care to rev up the old blog?? I'll be waiting...and checking...

(And btw...my title is a quote from what movie??) :~)

Pride Goeth Before the Fall...

...and I am falling. Not too happy about that. So, here's the thing: I am involved in this great study on Humility. As a Believer...and I AM a Believer...it is the purpose of my life to be more like Christ everyday. To be more like Christ. 100% God...100% Man who walked this earth in perfect, unblemished humility. Whose life was the epitome, the absolute embodiment of humility. Me...100% man. To be like Him. A goal too lofty, too difficult to attain. I know it...you know it...still; I strive for it. Knowing I will fail. Because I am 100% MAN!

I haven't really thought about being unable to attain a life like His, until I was faced with my own incredible guilt and pride...two things tucked away in the deepest, darkest chambers of my obviously worn out, dusty old heart. And I just want to THANK my sisters for helping make it this real by having the audacity to invite me to pray for my "old" home. Please, I say this tongue-in-cheek, do not get the idea I think praying is ludacris. Ridiculous maybe...ludacris, no. Oops...sorry, there I go again.

I had believed that my hurt poor-poor-pitiful-me feelings for this place had long vanished. Obviously those wounds were just hiding in those chambers I talked about before. Just waiting to be ripped open, raw and vulnerable. I don't WANT to pray for someone who hurt me. Who left me...forgotten and floundering in an unknown land of new ministry without a shred of respect. "Not even a kiss my foot or have an apple!" Hurt by my old home. Disrespected. Barren. Afraid. Vulnerable.

And if that wasn't bad enough...my NEW home thought I was evil. All of me. They didn't teach us this Pastor's wives school...oh wait, I didn't GO to school. Silly me.

Okay, here it is: PRIDE: 1. a high or inordinate opinion of one's own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc. 2. the state or feeling of being proud.
3. a becoming or dignified sense of what is due to oneself or one's position or character; self-respect; self-esteem.

BAD PRIDE. BAD BAD Pride! This IS the pride we are discussing in the study. Not the GOOD pride: PRIDE and joy: someone or something cherished, valued, or enjoyed above all others. That's what WE are to God. Our Heavenly Father. His pride and joy. The apple of His eye. Right? SOMEONE say yes.

There are a few definitions to the word pride. Look it up. :~) There is only one definition of the word HUMILITY: the quality or condition of being humble; modest opinion or estimate of one's own importance, rank, etc.

So...the idea of regarding myself as less than those around me (known or unknown) is not a foreign concept to me. I KNOW I am less. So, when I SAY I have "forgiven" a hurt against me, WHY do I allow pride to rear it's ugly, evil head? I really believed it had dissipated. Vanished. Disappeared.

Here I am, like Mephibosheth when he faced David "...Shuffling and stammering, not looking him in the eye, Mephibosheth said, "Who am I that you pay attention to a stray dog like me?" 2 Samuel 9:8 I AM a stray dog. Low, like a snake on the ground. Never seeing the pride until it's almost too late to do anything about it.

I am hurting. I do not want to have these feelings of despair. Like I CANNOT pray because my heart is overflowing with evil. I cannot find forgiveness. Not for them, not for me. So, here I lay...prostrate before my Father crying out in my despondancy...a new song for us:

"I need You Jesus, to come to my rescue, where else can I go, there’s no other Name by which I am saved, capture me with grace.

I have no place to go. No comfort for this 100% man. My pride is overwhelming me. Humility is a distant relief. I cannot reach it. Touch it. Holy Spirit, envelope me. Find me. Rescue me.

"Energize the limp hands,
strengthen the rubbery knees.
Tell fearful souls,
"Courage! Take heart!
God is here, right here,
on his way to put things right
And redress all wrongs.
He's on his way! He'll save you!" Isaiah 35:3-4 (The Message)

So...here I wait...

Who am I???

For you, BFF...this is what it came up with:

http://www.myheritage.com/collage

This is my morph: (well, this is the morph I chose! I like Kathy Bates!)

%1

Hope you all have fun trying this out! It can be really cool...and surprising!

(Go Giants!)

January Thunder

"When you used to tell me that you chase tornadoes, deep down I thought it was just a metaphor."

One of my favorite movies is "Twister"...the first time I saw it, we were sitting in BFF's living room...they had rented the video. I was intrigued. I thought..."I would love to do that!" The thrill...the rush...I get all goose-pimply.

Yesterday was one of those days. It was around 3:50 when the sirens went off. Rachigga and I were talking about the wedding. I flipped on the news. It would hit UG in 30 minutes. We called BDILE to make sure she was aware and alright. She was headed for the basement. Rachigga went to be with her beloved. Chief came home. The sirens went off again. He called BDILE. She was still in the basement. Cheerios had to move all his residents into the basement at the group home and wait. We continued to watch the news. More stories of tornado touchdown. Wheatland...Lake Geneva...Paddock Lake. We waited.

Another siren. Should we go downstairs? (Now...by this time in the reading of this story, I can hear BFF saying "YES...GO DOWNSTAIRS!") Of course, we didn't. The sky was magnificent. Churning and full of power. Of course, I took some pictures.

"You've never seen it miss this house, and miss that house, and come after you!"

A few hours later...after three more sirens...we received a call from one of our congregants. Her sister called her...sister goes to Prayer House. It was destroyed. The choir room. The sanctuary. When Chief hung up, he called our friends Sly and Bebo because they live within blocks of the church. Their home was fine...the house next door: the tornado ripped right down the middle of it. Sly's brother shot video. He was on the news.

These were pictures of Prayer House.

Scorpsdiva (MY sister) was sitting next to me and called HER friend from that same area...his garage was hit...the breezeway destroyed and his truck took the brunt of the damage. He would walk to another friends home on the bidding of Scorpsdiva because the friends' phone was out and she is fairly home bound.

Tacos El Rey, a favorite local restaurant had it's roof ripped right off.

We were never touched. We barely saw rain. Cheerios and BDILE are fine. Would I still chase after a tornado? Probably. For now...I pray for the families without power. Without homes. Without their church.